Friendship Files – Bling and Personality
So sad
This Child
Small Pale Limp
Like a plant
Dying of thirst
I suggest
We walk and talk
She begins to relax
Confesses miserably
“No one in my class wants to be my friend”
“Tell me, who you’d like as friends”
She speaks names
The popular
The pretty
Those who sparkle
With bling and personality
Anyone else?
She shakes a sulky head
She pours out a litany of times
She has tried to be friends
They just don’t listen
They ignore her efforts to be friends
We talk some more
I offer to help her work it out
She looks at me doubtfully
Without telling her
I arranged with her teacher to visit the room
I sneak in
Settle at the back
Watching events unfold
Tamsyn sits at a desk
In the middle of the room
To her left and behind her
The Bling girls
I watch as one brushes past Tamsyn’s desk
Papers flutter to the floor
Bling keeps on walking
No apology
No effort to help pick them up
Miss Personality leans across
Takes a ruler
From Tamsyn’s desk
Without asking
Without thanks
No connection at all
No attempt to return it
At the end of the lesson
The ruler is dropped on the floor
Soon the teacher
Tells Tamsyn to tidy her things
Another girl Annie
Helps pick up the papers
Little Annie
Quiet
Neat
Tidy
Respectful
Bright as a sunflower
Smiles Tamsyn’s way
But she is not seen
Tamsyn only has eyes
For Miss Bling
For Miss Personality
The whole drama
Takes but a little time
I don’t doubt
It plays out
Regularly
Every day
In many ways
I wonder what it is
That keep us
Floundering in shallowness
Hopeful of a turning tide
Of friendship
Drawn to those who misuse us
We invest
We dream
Hopeful of winning them over
Bling and Personality
Keep Tamsyn interested
Blind to other possibilities
By marking her card
They give her hope
But leave her disappointment
It is an
Abuse of convenience
Next time we chat
She remains devoted to
Bling and Personality
I ask about Annie
“Who?”
“She sits next to you in class”
“Oh yes…I don’t know her”
“She helped you pick up those papers”
“Did she???”
The Gentle Annie
Had not even registered
On Tamsyn’s radar
I am amazed at how soon
I see
Tamsyn and Annie
Together in the playground
When next I visit the room
I note
Tamsyn’s body language has changed
Her desk now tidy
No longer ‘available’
To Bling and Personality
They don’t like the changes
They try to get her attention now
Poking her in the back with a ruler
Throwing paper pellets her way
Tamsyn continues working
A reassuring glance at Annie
Keeping her firm
When the teacher asks the class
To gather in groups
Tamsyn & Annie are joined by others
And I make a note
To include
Bling and Personality
In the next of my group activities
Words and Photographs © Denise Stanford 2012
Within the Vine 
I guess we’ve all been there. To be honest, I think I’ve each of them at times.
Blessings Gail
Yes we all make mistakes, raising awareness and enabling change for each is what matters. Blessings
powerful. beautiful.