Worthwhile
It was a lovely photograph.
A selfie taken by a man who clearly adores the woman snuggled close behind him.
Her face lay against his shoulder, her arms draped around him in restful reassurance.
All who gazed at it felt the warmth of the sun
Could smell the ozone of the changing sea
We smile at their togetherness…
Well, all but one
The woman looked at her own image and saw only imperfection.
She picked away at what she saw, tearing it down
What she spoke over it wiped away all joy of the moment
Clearly there was relational breakdown here, but not what you might think.
The couple, still very much in Love, is together and happy to be so.
No! The relationship that has broken down is with herself
In criticising herself she curses that which was intended for Blessing
That which God intended for Blessing
I do it
Most of us do it, if not all.
That critical glance in a mirror or shop window
That murmured put down
That self judgement to a standard held so high
That moment when a compliment is replaced by a barb
‘You look lovely’ met with ‘Oh this old thing’
When the reason for thanksgiving is tossed aside as no such thing.
Recently I asked my husband if I did anything he didn’t like
His yes came as a shock!
He told me I was
Far too self critical
Far too negative about myself
At first I denied it but he turned a mirror on me that day
He enabled me to recognise
How I Slash or Tear at my Self image
How I curse myself
We prayed
I prayed
I asked God
Show me how this hurts You
I believe He did
In Psalm 139 He shows me how treasured I am
Through Song of Songs how beautiful I am
God loves me as I am
He loves me so much
He put Himself through Hell literally for my sake.
When I attack myself
I deny that Beauty
I deny all the Bounty
I deny all that Love
I hold myself to a Higher Standard than God
What Arrogance!
To call God ‘LIAR!’
When I put myself down
I open the door to the Enemy
I invite Satan in
I give him the weapons
I show him the targets at which to strike
Then I help him
By cursing myself
He is the thief
He wants me to plunder God’s treasure
He wants me
To deny truth
To believe lies
To live the curse
Doing this
I curse
That which God made for Blessing
Doing this
I curse
That which God set apart for Himself
In the Old Testament I read
Of the lavish Glory and Beauty built into God’s Temple,
I read of the desecration of that Holy Place
With Lies
Foreign gods
Profane deities
Crude idols to Baal and Asherah
God’s Word says I am the Temple of the Holy Spirit
But so often
I daub those walls with graffiti
With Lies
I am no good
I am nothing
Too fat
Too thin
Too wrinkly
Too old, too grey
Too short, too tall,
I am ugly, disabled, weak, useless…
Hopeless
Worthless
Tell me you’ve never said any of that about yourself
They are lies
All lies
We need to stop
We need to stop the curses
We need to stop cursing ourselves
No we are not perfect
We are being perfected, in Christ
We are Worthwhile
You are Worthwhile
It is time to
Accept all God has blessed you with
Time to accept
All God has Blessed
With you
Psalm 139
Song of Solomon
1 Corinthians 6:19-20
Words and pictures © Denise Stanford-Buller 2017
Within the Vine 
Thank you dear Denise. We all need that reminder .
Denise. Thank you so much for reminding me how we all hurt God when we speak negatively about ourselves, HIS creation.
We are indeed beautiful women fearfully and wonderfully made ( psalm 139:14). Wonderful are His works, and that my soul knows very well.
You hit the nail on the head Denise. I need to read this every day till it sinks in.
Sent from my iPhone